Tuesday, 8 July 2014

Indie Lyrics Adapted for the Modern Death Metal Fan

Coming back at you like a weird and persistent uncle, it's TMINI's switchy lyricy thing that I did...once. Except now I'm doing it again. Except different. I've no shame in rehashing an old idea, if you thought I was above that; you don't really know me at all. I don't care how dead the horse is, I'll flog that. I'll flog that every single time. 

The Indie fan and the Death Metal fan don't have a lot of common ground. One takes ecstasy and gets into weepy DMCs in the smoking area of a club that plays Joy Division dance remixes and the other masturbates, alone, always. If you put the two together, you basically get the worst person in the entire world. So let's join those worlds together and see what happens. Here's some Indie lyrics adapted to accommodate the modern Death Metal fan.

The XX - Angels

And with words unspoken
A silent devotion
I know you know what I mean
And the end is unknown
But I think I’m ready
As long as you’re with me


Until every bone is broken,
Until your blood I lay soaking,
No one will hear your screams,
Your mouth has been sewn,
Now I am ready,
To ejaculate all that's in me

Arcade Fire - Reflektor

I thought I found a way to enter
It’s just a Reflektor (It's just a Reflektor)
I thought I found the connector
It’s just a Reflektor (It's just a Reflektor)

You thought I couldn't enter,
But I am the deathly specter (Deathly fucking specter),
You thought you could protect her,
But I've already fucking wrecked her (Fucking wrecked her)

Bastille - Pompeii

Eh-eh-o eh-o 
I was left to my own devices
Many days fell away with nothing to show

I want to be left in tiny slices,
Eat me slowly, eat me whole

The Killers - Human

Are we human or are we dancer?
My sign is vital, my hands are cold
And I'm on my knees looking for the answer
Are we human or are we dancer?

Destroy all life, we are a cancer!
Your vital signs wither, your body grows cold,
And I'm on my knees, slamming down the hammer,
Eradicate humanity, we are a cancer!

Two Door Cinema Club - What You Know

In a few weeks, I will get time
To realize it's right before my eyes
And I can take it
If it's what I want to do

My torture chamber reeks, its sinister design,
What I see right before my eyes,
Corpses floating in barrels of shit,
The trophies of victims I've subdued,

Tegan And Sara - Closer

Here comes the breath before we get a little bit closer
Here comes the rush before we touch, come a little closer

Here comes the knife directly to your jugular,
Here comes my dick, probably going in your jugular
(Kinda phoned it in with this one)

The Postal Service - Such Great Heights

I am thinking it's a sign
That the freckles in our eyes
Are mirror images and when
We kiss they're perfectly aligned

Covered from head to toe in slime,
Fucking the holes which were once your eyes,
I review the CCTV footage and once again
I left too much of you at the scene of the crime

Fun - We Are Young

We are young,
So let's set the world on fire,
we can burn brighter than the sun.

You'll become gunge,
Bodily fumes get me higher,
It won't be long before I cum

Fleet Foxes - Your Protector

As you lay to die beside me, baby
On the morning that you came
Would you wait for me?
The other one would wait for me

You run with the devil
You run with the devil

I've gone insane with human rabies,
Feasting on your rotting remains,
And with absolute glee,
I make sure your children see,

I run with the devil,
I run with the devil,

The Decemberists - Don't Carry It All

A monument to build beneath the arbors
Upon a cliff that towers towards the trees
But every vessel pitching hard to starboard
Lay it's head on summers freckled knees

A monument constructed before the temple of slaughter,
Skeletal dust is carried by the breeze,
And not a slither of flesh left by the ravenous horde,
Nothing but carnage as far as the eyes can see

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